He Said What...

Did he just say what I think he said??  That is a common phrase uttered between my husband and I.  More now that our little one is quite the motor mouth.  When he isn’t asking “what is that?”, it’s “what are you doing?”.  Most things that come out of his mouth aren’t too shocking.  It’s more along the lines of “oh, I didn’t know he knew that word”.  But this one takes the cake….  One evening, our buppie child demanded that he be measure with a tape, aka the tape measure.  I dutifully pulled it out of the junk drawer and proceeded to attempt to get him to stand still and straight to get an accurate measurement.  We guestimated that he was 38 inches tall.  This is an important tidbit for the remainder of this story.

The next morning, as we are in my closest deciding what Mommy is going to wear to work that day.  Daddy asked the child “how tall are you?”.  I whispered to him that he’s “38 inches tall”.  The child proceeded to answer Daddy with “38 b**tches tall”.  Say what?!?!?  Did he just say what we thought he said??  So we ask the question again and we get the same answer.  What kind of pimp mess are they teaching him at this school that costs more than our old mortgage??  Does he have 38 b**tches at school following him around??  NO, because there are only 2 little girls in his class.  He father would like to think this is some sort of inherent quality that he has passed down to his “seed”.  I think that our son has some sort of speech impediment.  Perhaps, we should get him tested?  His father says “no, he just has pimp bones in his body”.  I don’t even know what that means.  He’s saying it’s in a rap song…yeah, whatevs.

So after chuckling for days about this, when the child is not around, we’ve decided that perhaps we should convert to the metric system so that we don’t have these issues going forward.  I can just imagine the parent teacher conference coming our way in the first grade…

PS Daddy is already on the lookout for a tiny pimp suit for Halloween. 

PPS I’m pretty sure that’s not allowed at the bourgeoisie school he attends.